You wouldn’t believe it, the singer says. At that moment preparing for her first album release in nearly a decade, blissfully happy with her newish partner, and at long last the mother of a toddler after struggling to conceive for ten years, riding high. Suddenly in March she was diagnosed with cancer in her breast.
The musician, real name Jessica Cornish, is famous for speaking her mind. The LP, the provocatively titled album, was meant as an candid account, tackling every moment of pain she’d faced since she last worked on songs (a gynecological condition, losing a baby, failed relationships, psychological manipulation, mental health struggles) with her usual frankness. The lead track, her single No Secrets, was dropped in April. But by then there existed a huge secret. The illness. Then second single, the upbeat Living My Best Life, was released in May and she was talking to press about how she was living her best life, while all the while coping with breast cancer. Four weeks after she shared the news, and in the start of summer she had a mastectomy.
She offers me her best “What the fuck?” expression. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every interview, and they ask, ‘What’s happening?’ and I answer, ‘Uh, nothing really’” Cornish has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s still waiting for reconstructive surgery.
We meet at a photo studio in London. She is sporting a light brown synthetic jacket, denim trousers with elaborate white patches, beige footwear and oversized specs. Picture rocker vibe meets vintage look. “I feel like I’m in the seventies and I should have a man with facial hair.” Easy Rider, I say, referencing the picture. “That’s what people called me at school!” She smiles. Jessie is quick, bold and filter-free. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is aiming for her standup debut in the coming year. “I love making people laugh. During performances I often tease the fans.”
Personal Battles and News
She was preparing for an appearance at the awards show when she discovered a mass. “I quickly sought to get it examined, had an ultrasound, and they told me, ‘It looks like nothing; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I was, like, ‘However, it’s there. I’ve got an achy arm and pins and needles in my hands whenever I rise.’ And they suggested, ‘We should biopsy it?’ That was 28 March, the following my birthday.” It was a Friday. The physician told her if it was serious she’d contact on the Monday. By then she had persuaded herself it was nothing. The way she tells it, it was just bad timing to get cancer when she had many commitments.
“It was a fortnight prior from debuting the project after a long hiatus and four years without a single. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I was, like, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I jump on the Zoom expecting it’s all going to be good, and she says, ‘You might want to sit.’ That sympathetic voice? And she reveals, ‘Unfortunately but your reports have indicated aggressive cancer.’” How did you respond? “I answered, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She viewed the procedure terrifying and absurd. “I hate being put under. They walk you down. During crises you are wheeled, but now I just marched with a gown on and my bum hanging out. Like a dystopian scene.” But, she notes, she’s been fortunate. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the surgery. “Cancer sucks, man, but you know what? I’m grateful it was caught soon. I underwent removal four months ago and my affected breast now appears as a fruit under fabric.” Another grin. “The nipple was preserved.”
The follow-up procedure is for health and appearance. Her boobs, she notes, are now “asymmetrical. The implant is larger than before. How rude! I thought, no need to bully me, I’m already having a hard period. So rude! It’s funny because I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be ideal. Cancer ruined that plan.”
Previous Struggles
Cornish is no stranger to illness. She believes her attitude toward illness has been so positive because she’s used to physical challenges. Many times they occur alongside peak moments, serving as a tap on the shoulder, or blow, to make her recall not to take anything for granted. “Truly, I feel fate says, ‘Things going well? Hold on.’ Ever since I was a child, it has consistently accompanied high points for me; a major or strange event has happened to my health.”
She takes me back to her 11-year-old self, already making her debut performing in the stage in Whistle Down the Wind (she was cast at the age of nine). That’s when she was diagnosed with the heart condition a syndrome, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as vertigo and palpitations. “I rehearsed between visits on an drip, and being readmitted at night.” She skips forward six years, and 17-year-old Jess has joined the trio the group while enrolled in the academy. “I secured a deal, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was ready to debut in recently I had a collision and my throat was injured and I was unable to vocalize for a twelve months.”
Hey, I say, wait, I am overwhelmed. You really had a stroke at 17? She nods|agrees
